Who is “The Flat Girl”?

I turned 44 this year and, until recently, have not fully explored the justification for my many failed relationships both romantic and familial.  Certainly, I had pondered over the years what I was doing wrong when interacting with my family or why I just seemed to have such bad luck with men.

Then, recently I was told by somebody I am very “flat” in interpersonal situations,

Paper Doll,  ca. 1920
Paper Doll, ca. 1920 (Photo credit: Minnesota Historical Society)

and I have no affect.  They went on to explain  it was in direct conflict with my public persona because I am typically very charming, gregarious, popular, and social.  My first reaction was to be surprised, until I thought about something somebody else said about me once.  They said I treat everybody as if I am conducting business with them.  While I would never have thought it to be an insult, I am now beginning to take pause at the thought.

So, I want to explore the notion of being “the flat girl”, not necessarily a girl with no personality, as I have plenty to spare… but rather a girl who, for some reason, does not have the ability to share emotion or feeling with those closest to me.  I want to write this blog and explore those feelings, thoughts, and emotions and hope others will explore theirs as well.